Thin Envelopes

The mail arrived around three pm today, and I got a letter from Azusa Pacific University. Kimmy handed it to me, promising that she hadn't opened it, that it was just like that when she had gotten it out of the mailbox. I was on the phone with a friend, talking about working out later, as I slipped the single sheet of paper out of the thin envelope, expecting the normal form letter urging me to attend their school.

But that's not what it was.

Of course that's not what it was.

It was my first denial letter. Ever. I was denied the Trustees Scholarship. Furthermore, I wasn't even one of the 40 finalists.

At first I was shocked and indignant. I wasn't a finalist? I have a 4.36 GPA, thankyouverymuch. I received a 2100 on the SAT on my first try. I got two FIVES on AP tests, and my other scores were fours. I've never recieved a B in my life, and over the past two years I will have done around 400 community service hours. And I have a dynamic testimony that speaks volumes of the love of Christ. How could there have possibly been 40 applications that were better than mine?

And all of that went through my mind in about 3 seconds. Then I breathed a sigh of relief and realized that now I'm not tied down to Azusa. Maybe God wants me at Biola, which is pretty darn exciting. Yes, it will be harder to pay for now, but I realized that in the most painful times of my life is when I am closest to Him. And if it takes some financial worries to draw me near to my God, I'll take it.